Weasley Babysitting
by Joey Potter
Summary: Takes place around 1982. Mr and Mrs Weasley are going out, and Bill and Charlie have to watch their younger siblings. Please R/R.


Disclaimer: I don't own the Weasley family or the grandfather's clock. I do own the plot, the story, the songs and The Wicked Wizards.  
  
BABYSITTING!  
  
"Are you sure you can make it?" Mrs Weasley asked her two eldest sons, Bill and Charlie.  
  
"Of course, Mum. Now just go, have fun. We'll take care of the little guys", Charlie said.  
  
"He's right. Come on, dear", said Mr Weasley. He and his wife were going out for the first time in four months, and since they couldn't find a babysitter, Bill and Charlie should be babysitting their younger siblings.  
  
"You know where the diapers are, the dinner is in the oven - you just have to turn it on - Ron and Ginny shall be in bed at seven, and the twins and Percy at eight..."  
  
"Mum, WE KNOW!" Bill told his mum.  
  
"Well, okay..... then goodbye, my dears", Mrs Weasley said, kissed and hugged all her seven children and then her and her husband Apparated.  
  
"Why is she so nervous?" Charlie asked and sat down on the couch. "I mean - you're fourteen and I'm thirteen - we're almost adults. Babysitting can't be that hard".  
  
"Bill, I'm hungry", six-year-old Percy said and pulled Bill's sleeve.  
  
"Okay, Perce, we'll make dinner", Bill said and went to the kitchen.  
  
The dinner turned out to be good, and even Ron ate up.  
  
"What about Ginny? You have to feed her", Bill said.  
  
"Me? No, you do that!" Charlie said. Bill rolled his eyes.  
  
"Okay with me". He took Ginny's fork.  
  
"Look, Ginny, it's an airplane! And it flies right into your mouth!" he said. Ginny giggled and let Bill put the food in her mouth. But then she spit it out on his sweatshirt. "Oh no! Ginny!" he shouted. His brothers laughed at him, and Ginny clapped her hands.  
  
"It's not funny!" he said. Ginny took a handful of food from her plate and chucked it after Charlie.  
  
"Hey!" Charlie bellowed, wiping baby food from his eyes. Bill laughed.  
  
"Do you think it's funny? Laugh at this!" Charlie said and chucked a handful of food after Bill.  
  
"Charlie! Stop that! We're supposed to be the grown-ups tonight!" Bill said and tried to clean his sweatshirt with a napkin.  
  
But now the twins started throwing food at each other. George hit Percy with a potato, and Percy started crying. Ron and Ginny laughed, and Charlie - well - he helped the twins. Bill tried to comfort Percy, and then, suddenly, he yelled: "STOP!!! RIGHT NOW!!! OR I'LL KILL YOU!!!" They all stopped and looked at Bill and the kitchen went silent.  
  
"That's better", Bill said.  
  
"Bill", said Fred quietly, "you won't kill us, will you?"  
  
"No, I won't. But no more food fighting tonight!" Bill said. The twins nodded.  
  
"No more food fighting", they repeated.  
  
"Well, I guess someone needs a bath", Bill said, looking at his siblings.  
  
"Yeah, he's right. Go to the bathroom, you little pigs", Charlie said, smiling.  
  
"And you'll go with them, you little pig", Bill said and laid his hands on Charlie's shoulders.  
  
"I shouldn't have done that", he then said as his right hand become covered in something that could have had been food a long time ago.  
  
An hour later, the bathroom looked like a tornado had been in there, but all the Weasley children were perfectly clean.  
  
"Oh, it's 7:00, we'd better put Ginny and Ron in bed", Bill said.  
  
"Bill...." Charlie said, "something.... stinks". Bill sniffed.  
  
"You're right. Oh no! It's Ginny!"  
  
"Well...."  
  
"Well... it's no big deal. One of us just has to change her diaper". Bill looked at Charlie.  
  
"Oh no! No, no, no! I'm NOT changing her diaper! No way!"  
  
"I fed her! Now it's your turn!" Bill shouted.  
  
"But she's your sister!"  
  
"She's yours too!"  
  
"Well..... okay, that's right. But I'm still not doing it!"  
  
"Charlie, come on. It's not that bad. I mean.... it's disgusting - but so are you. Just do it".  
  
"No! And I'm not disgusting!"  
  
"Okay, okay. You're not disgusting..."  
  
"Bill? Me need a new dapper", Ron said.  
  
"A new dapper? Oh, a new diaper, yes, of course, Ronnie... great, now there's one for both of us".  
  
"Fine. I'll take Ginny! She's the smallest", Charlie said and carried Ginny to the nursery.  
  
"Wait, I don't have any idea about how to do this! You do it first", he told Bill.  
  
"Okay..... I can do this.... er..." Bill laid Ron on the drying-table and took off his diaper.  
  
"Oh..... he's just peed! Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you....." Bill changed Ron's diaper, gave Charlie a big smile and stepped out of the way for his brother in that case Charlie should be feeling like giving him a black eye or something. He looked like he felt like that. He took off Ginny's diaper.  
  
"Oh no..... fuck.... hell..... damn...."  
  
"Stop swearing, Charlie, there are kids in the room", Bill said. Charlie sent him a death glare, and Bill shut up.  
  
"Fucking hell, I have to wipe her ass, don't I?" Charlie demanded. Bill nodded. Charlie swore again.  
  
A couple of minutes later, Ginny were finish.  
  
"Ha! Am I a fantastic big brother or what?" Charlie said. Bill chose not to answer.  
  
"Now we just have to tug them in and make them sleep, right?" Charlie said and laid Ginny down in her crib. Bill laid Ron down, and then they waited.  
  
"Why don't they sleep?" Charlie demanded and looked at Bill.  
  
"I don't know! Maybe we should sing them a lullaby".  
  
"We? What do you mean 'we'? I can't sing!" Charlie said.  
  
"Honestly! They're one and two years old! I really don't think they care!"  
  
"What shall we sing then?"  
  
Bill thought for a moment. "Oh! I know!" Then he started singing:  
  
"I'm the cool guy, I'm known in every town  
  
Every place I go, there's sexy girls around  
  
I have the newest Nimbus  
  
I have tight black leather clothes  
  
And I...."  
  
"Bill! The Wicked Wizards don't exactly make lullabies!" Charlie interrupted.  
  
"No, you're right. But I don't know any lullabies!" Bill told his little brother.  
  
"Then we just have to make one", Charlie said. Bill looked at him like he was insane. Then he sighed.  
  
"Well, I guess you're right. I'll start". He bent down over Ron and sang:  
  
"It's time for sleep,  
  
My own little Ronnie". Then he looked at Charlie for him to continue.  
  
"Count some sheep,  
  
My sweet little Ginny", Charlie sang. Bill smiled at him and continued:  
  
"The moon is up,  
  
And the night is here....."  
  
"Er.... you'll fly in a cup  
  
To a land without fear". Bill stared at his brother.  
  
"You'll fly in a cup?" he said. Charlie shrugged.  
  
"I couldn't think of anything else that rhymed on 'up'". Bill shook his head.  
  
"To dreamland you go  
  
And sing and play......"  
  
"Anything you can do..... er......  
  
Even be gay......"  
  
"Charlie!" Bill interrupted.  
  
"What was I supposed to do? Stop singing?" Charlie demanded.  
  
"Oh, shut up. This doesn't works, they're still awake", Bill said, looking at Ron and Ginny in the cribs. Suddenly, Percy appeared in the door.  
  
"What are you doing up here?" he asked.  
  
"We're trying to make Ron and Ginny go to sleep", Bill explained, "but we can't". Percy glared at them.  
  
"You can't?!" He rolled his eyes. "Big brothers", he muttered, stepped forward to the cribs and started singing.  
  
"Twinkle, twinkle, little star  
  
How I wonder what you are  
  
Up above the world so high  
  
Like a diamond in the sky  
  
Twinkle, twinkle, little star  
  
How I wonder what you are". When Percy finished the song, both Ron and Ginny were asleep.  
  
"How did you do that?" Charlie whispered.  
  
"Mum always sings that song to them before they go to sleep. Didn't you know that?" Percy asked. Bill and Charlie shook their heads.  
  
"Anyway, nice job, Percy. Now let's go downstairs and...... oh no", Bill trailed off.  
  
"What?" Charlie asked.  
  
"The twins. They're downstairs. Alone", Bill said. And without hesitating, the three eldest Weasley brothers ran down the stairs and into the living room.  
  
CRASH!!! They reached it just in time to see the grand father's clock hit the floor. The twins stood beside it and tried to look innocent.  
  
"I didn't do anything!" Fred said, "it was George's fault!"  
  
"No, it wasn't! It was all Fred's fault!" George shouted.  
  
"I don't care!" Bill told them. "Go to bed! NOW!" The twins pouted and went upstairs.  
  
"Percy.... go up and look after them", Charlie told Percy, before he and Bill raised the grand father's clock again. Luckily, nothing had happened to it. All the hands were still there.  
  
"STOP IT!" someone suddenly yelled from upstairs. Bill and Charlie ran up there, just to find the twins in a huge pillow fight, with feathers everywhere. Percy was crawling around on the floor, searching for his glasses, which George accidentally had knocked off with his pillow.  
  
"Hey, guys, stop that!" Charlie said, but the twins didn't stop. In fact, they didn't even hear him.  
  
"Fred! George! Stop that!" Charlie yelled. The twins stopped and looked at him.  
  
"Will you tell us a bedtime story?" Fred asked. Charlie glared at him.  
  
"Do I look like a guy who tells bedtime stories?" he asked.  
  
"Please?" Both twins made big puppy-eyes and looked up at Charlie, who sighed.  
  
"Okay, but only if I can have Bill to help me", he said. The twins looked at Bill.  
  
"Yeah, okay. We'll tell you a bedtime story. Get your pyjamas on and get into bed".  
  
A couple of minutes later, the bedtime story was about to begin. The twins lay in their beds, and Percy was in their room too.  
  
"Okay", Charlie began, "Once upon a time, there was a little princess...."  
  
"What was her name?" Percy interrupted.  
  
"Her name was... er.... Little Red Riding Hood", Charlie answered.  
  
"Charlie, you jerk! A princess can't be named that!" Bill said. "No, her name was Cecilia. And Cecilia lived with her father, the king, in a big, beautiful castle....."  
  
"This is a girl's story!" Fred interrupted.  
  
"Yeah! Tell us one with dragons, Charlie!" George said.  
  
"Okay! Once upon a time, there was a very, very evil wizard. He kept all the dragons in the world caught in a little, dark room. The dragons were very, very sad about this, because the evil wizard hardly fed them. The evil wizard's name was...... Big Bad Bill!"  
  
"What?!" Bill bellowed. "I don't want to be the bad guy!"  
  
"I haven't said it's you! I just said his name was Big Bad Bill!" Charlie shot back.  
  
"Continue the story!" George said, and Charlie continued.  
  
"But then, the bravest wizard in the whole world went out to save the dragons. His name was....."  
  
"Chunky Charlie!" Bill said, before Charlie could go on.  
  
"Hey! This is my story!"  
  
"You said you wanted my help!"  
  
"Not like that!"  
  
Bill shrugged. "Just go on with the story", he said.  
  
"His name was Champ Charlie and he......."  
  
"......got his name because he always was eating".  
  
"Shut up, Bill! I didn't mean champ that way, and you know that!" Charlie shouted.  
  
"Okay, but Chaffy Charlie went out to save the dragons....."  
  
"Bill! Shut up and let me tell the story! Champ Charlie went out to save the dragons. He flew on his Nimbus 1985 - hurrier than the wind - and he reached Big Bad Bill's dark castle".  
  
"Chancy Charlie went inside...."  
  
"Bill, SHUT UP! Okay, Champ Charlie went inside, were Big Bad Bill waited with his wand. He hit Champ Charlie with one of the Unforgivable Curses - the Killing Curse. But Champ Charlie wasn't only the bravest wizard in the whole world, he was also the strongest. He defeated the Killing Curse!"  
  
"Like Harry Potter?" Percy asked.  
  
"Yes, like Harry Potter. But now was Champ Charlie angry. He took his wand, and aimed at Big Bad Bill. Of course, Big Bad Bill got scared. He had never met anyone who could defeat the Killing Curse before...."  
  
"But even though he was scared, he could still manage to hit Cheating Charlie in the face and knock his teeth out!" Bill said.  
  
"Stop it, Bill! Big Bad Bill fell down on his knees and kissed Champ Charlie's feet, and afterwards, he let all the dragons out. Champ Charlie didn't kill him, because he thought Big Bad Bill would be a lot more useful as his servant. And that was what happened and they lived happily ever after. The end".  
  
"That was the worst story ever!" Bill said.  
  
"I like it!" Fred said.  
  
"Me too", George added.  
  
"And now, it's time for you to go to bed", Charlie said and tugged the twins in. Bill grumbled, took Percy's hand and led him to his room.  
  
A couple of hours later, Bill and Charlie had cleaned up the kitchen, the bathroom and the living room, and they were totally exhausted.  
  
"I'm totally exhausted", Charlie said and lay down on the couch.  
  
"Me too. But at least we're finish now", Bill said.  
  
"I'll never be a babysitter again. Never", Charlie said.  
  
A couple of minutes later, Mr and Mrs Weasley came home.  
  
"Hi boys. Has it been a good evening?" Mrs Weasley asked. But the only answer she got was a light snoring. Her two eldest boys were asleep. She smiled and went upstairs to see if the younger ones were in bed. Mr and Mrs Weasley opened the door to Fred and George's room, and the twins were out of bed in no time and ran to their parents.  
  
"Mum! Dad! We want Bill and Charlie to babysit us the next time, too!" they shouted in unison.  
  
Percy opened his door and came out.  
  
"I want them too! It was so fun. I'll never have anyone else to babysit me!" he said.  
  
"Well", said Mr Weasley, "I'm sure both Bill and Charlie would love to babysit all of you from now on. And your Mum and I have had a very good time, so actually, we talked about doing this more often......"  
  
THE END ? 


End file.
